My mother has been in the hospital twice in thirty days. And yesterday, everything in me just… unraveled. I couldn’t sit still. Couldn’t think straight. Couldn’t even sleep last night.

After six and a half years of caregiving, you’d think I’d have some sort of rhythm or “resilience.” But that’s the myth, isn’t it? That this gets easier. That we eventually master the balancing act.

The truth? Sometimes there’s no balance, no breathing room, no space for me in my own life.

And yesterday, I prayed.
I cried.
I picked myself up more than once.
And I kept going.

Because that’s what caregivers do, and some days just look like utter chaos.

This Is Not a Job. Like it or Not, It’s a Life.

Caregiving isn’t something you clock in and out of. It’s a 24/7 storm made of hospital runs, med schedules, brain fog, worry, finances, and a body that’s often breaking under the weight of holding it all up. There are days when it feels like no one sees it. Like you’re spinning inside a hurricane while everyone else is walking calmly through sunshine.

But I see you. And I am you.

This Is a Marathon — Mentally, Physically, and Spiritually

People talk about caregiving like it’s some noble task. And it is noble. But it’s also back-breaking, soul-splitting, and lonely as hell some days. This disease — whatever form it takes — isn’t a sprint. It’s a grueling marathon, and most days, you’re running it on no sleep, no plan, and no backup team. Every once in a while it breaks me.

What Can People Do to Help? (Hint: Don’t Over-complicate It)

If you love a caregiver, please hear this:
We are not looking for more things to schedule. We’re already drowning in appointments and calendars and decisions.

What we need is simple.

• Drop off a meal. (thank you, to my angel who did this for us yesterday)
• Mow the lawn or help do a simple clean out to help for winter.
• Text “I’m going to the store. Need anything?”
• Bring a coffee and don’t expect small talk – we get enough of that with our loved ones.
• Send a funny video just to make us laugh.

Don’t wait for us to ask. We won’t. We don’t have the bandwidth to think about how you can help — we’re too busy keeping someone else alive. Literally – and it is intense.

Caregiver Hack of the Week

Time-Box Your Tasks
When chaos strikes (and it always does), don’t write a to-do list. Instead, break your day into two-hour blocks. I can’t as I run a business also, and it has to be that way.
If you can, give each block ONE focus only — like:

• 9–11am: Deal with insurance and meds
• 11–1pm: Rest or shower (yes, put this in!)
• 1–3pm: Work, errands, or nap
• 3–5pm: Time with your loved one.

This helps you stay grounded when everything feels like it’s on fire.

You Are Not Alone – Even When It Feels Like It.

If you’re reading this with tears welling up or exhaustion making your hands shake — I see you. I am you. And you are not alone. You are in the fight, and you are doing great. You really are. Look at all you do. I know your tired, love, but keep going.

Caregiving is not something we were designed to do solo. We need honesty, vulnerability, and community to make it through.

There’s no shame in feeling broken.
There’s no guilt in needing help. We all need it.
And there is no one way to do this right.

Do the best you can, and let that be enough – because it has to be and if you lead with love – it will be.

Here is wishing for better days ahead.